The Cavewoman In Me.

Today I have learnt something about myself. Subconsciously, I am a cavewoman. I am not the progressive up and about modern day Miss that I have always thought to be. I am a regressive, ancient cavewoman disguised in modern attire, my secret identity further clouded by the usage of up-to-date, latest gadgets and technologies. Stripped bare of all the above mentioned, I am still the very same cavewoman.

Spring-cleaned my room this morning. In order to accommodate a new queen-sized bed (to replace my now ex single bed) to fit into my tiny room, I had to seriously plan the most efficient space usage to maximize walking space and storage space. Did not plan having to tiptoe around the room. The task was nerve wrecking. Not so easy after all. The strategy? Throw out all unwanted stuff.

The problem was: Everything seemed too important to be thrown away…

If we go all the way back to ancient gender history, women were the collector, while men were the hunters. The men’s job was to hunt for animals in order to put some food on the plate and on the other hand, the women would find the best way to make sure foodstuff would be sufficient for the coming days. This instinct was especially strong especially when bitter winter months approached. They might have even felt desperate urges to store as much as possible. The ancient women might even have invented ways of curing meat, vegetables and grains (not sure, probably true)!

I could imagine cavemen sitting and lying around, bragging about who got the most catches or who killed the biggest mammoth. Probably with a pint of beer in hand, laughing their heads off.

I saw the same ancient traits in me. This is a list of what I found as I rummaged through my stuff:

a) Letters from friends dating back to 1991
b) Part of my high school uniform! I can’t believe it (btw, I am 23)
c) Clothes that I have not worn since 4 years back
d) Clothes that I have never worn before (regretful buys)
e) Phone bills from yonks ago
f) Bits of scrap paper with scribbles on them of a few semesters back
g) “Almost-there” cellophane tape that just don’t belong in any civilized student’s desk
h) Rolls of unused (badly-crumpled!) A1 sized bond paper, which is not fit to be used anymore (to ditch, or not to ditch?)
i) More rolls of useless A1 sized bond paper with much scribbles and sketches which are meaningless now (why did I keep all these rubbish?)
j) Newspaper cuttings of my favourite soccer stars at the time of World Cup 1998 (Gasp! Btw its Paolo Maldini)
k) Collection of stamps started in 1986. Very badly-maintained
l) Leather purses, which were presents from my aunt. I think it was mold I saw growing on them!
m) Empty skincare containers (cleaned, might be useful someday)
n) Shoes
o) Ancient Nancy Drew mystery books
p) Magazines galore
q) Empty special edition Pepsi cans which are just not so special anymore
r) Lecture notes and past assignments. Every one of them. Not in good order though…
s) Trinkets, little beanie babies, McDonald’s furbies etc

The list is just too long. It is too painful to continue writing. Thinking back, how did I manage to live in all this mess? It was indeed a miracle.

Was it the nostalgic or the cavewoman in me?

I have decided to throw out all clutter from my life. Chucked all except the Maldini newspaper cuttings, some letters, some lecture notes, most of my shoes, beanie babies and my hopeless-looking stamp collection. I believe that my room would never ever reach Zen status, but at least it is now ALMOST minimalist. And I’m only 30% cavewoman.

I do not know for sure when the familiar tinge of regret would come to haunt me. I will try my very best to ignore it for the time being. A revolution is taking place here!

xxx,
roachz